Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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