i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
