ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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