Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
