he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We need to rekindle our bromance
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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