Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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