More tranny stories later!
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
