Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize