i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
