I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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