imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
