Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
