You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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