Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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