I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
