Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize