At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
