K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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