Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize