I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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