More tranny stories later!
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
