People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
