So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
My feet surprised me
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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