thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
