There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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