.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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