I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
