I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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