But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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