im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize