We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Randomize
