it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
