Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Boobs are out for the taking
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
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