Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It's never too late to be topless.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize