I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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