I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You've changed since you got that strap on
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
