I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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