nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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