Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
