your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
