i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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