Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize