So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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