Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Your penis caused this!
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