Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize