You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
