so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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