That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
