8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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