Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I need to sanitize my soul.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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