I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
